I wonder if you finally love yourself—really love yourself.
If you stopped overthinking every decision , every silence, every “what if.”
If you learned to let life rise and fall without trying to fix it all.
Did years of therapy finally pay off? Did you stop shrinking for people who couldn’t see you, stop giving pieces of yourself to those who only took?
Did you accept that some people are on different cliffs than you, walking their own paths, and that it’s okay? That letting go doesn’t mean losing, it means surviving, growing, becoming whole?
I hope you let yourself cry when you needed to.
I hope you rested when you were tired.
I hope you stopped staying in love that drained you, that used your body or your heart as if it were disposable.
I hope you found love that lifts instead of breaks, that builds instead of takes.
But even if you didn’t, I hope you discovered that the most important love was always the one you gave yourself.
Please remind me, the younger me, that walking away isn’t failing.
That choosing yourself is courage, not selfishness.
That reality—messy, imperfect, painful reality—is where love grows.
And I hope, after all the hurt, all the waiting, all the letting go… you finally feel at peace.
What daily habit do you do that improves your quality of life?
Self – validation
you asked me what small, daily habit has made the biggest impact on my life, my answer might surprise you: it’s giving myself the validation I used to look for from others
For a long time, I believed that love, recognition, or encouragement had to come from outside of me—whether from a partner, a parent, or a friend. When it didn’t, I felt overlooked, unseen, and not good enough. But I’ve realized that waiting for someone else to validate me is like waiting for rain in a drought: you can’t control when or if it comes.
So instead, I’ve learned to give myself what I need.
Some days, self-validation looks like whispering to myself:
“I did my best today, and that’s enough.”
“I’m proud of myself for showing up, even when it’s hard.”
“My feelings are real, and they matter.”
Other days, it’s simply pausing to acknowledge that I made it through another day, despite the challenges.
This practice hasn’t magically erased my struggles, but it has shifted the way I carry them. Instead of walking through life desperate for someone else to notice me, I’m practicing noticing myself. And that, in turn, helps me set healthier boundaries, trust my own voice, and recognize my worth—whether or not anyone else sees it.
Validation doesn’t always have to come from the outside. Sometimes, the most healing words are the ones you say to yourself.
Right now , I feel the sting of being overlooked. Growing up, my dad wasn’t really there for me, while others around him were. That’s left a mark — one I still feel in relationships today.
Sometimes, it’s frustrating, sometimes it hurts, but it also reminds me: I’ve learned to protect my own heart and care for myself first.
Let’s talk:
How do you protect your heart when others can’t meet your needs?
Do you find yourself giving more than you get in relationships?
Share a lesson you wish you had learned earlier in life.
A Lesson I Wish I Had Learned Earlier in Life
Looking back, the one lesson I wish I’d learned much sooner in life—or rather, that my parents should have instilled in me—was the burden of constantly “wearing a mask.” For years, I found interacting with people utterly exhausting, and I couldn’t figure out why. Now I realize it was because I was never truly being myself. I was always hiding behind a façade, pretending to be who I thought others wanted me to be. I wasn’t just afraid of being open or vulnerable—I was conditioned to believe that being myself was somehow wrong. Every time I showed my true self, it was met with criticism or disapproval, making me retreat even further behind the mask.
In my downtime, I finally felt at peace. Alone, I could drop the act, and for a moment, I could just be—no expectations, no pressure to live up to anyone else’s standards. I didn’t have to worry about disappointing anyone or feeling like I wasn’t enough. It was a brief but liberating escape from the constant performance I put on in front of others.
But what I wish I had understood earlier is how deeply I had tied my sense of self-worth to the attention of others. I equated attention with love, care, and approval. If someone wasn’t giving me their attention, I assumed it meant their feelings toward me had changed. That lack of attention made me feel insecure, like I wasn’t enough without their validation.
I see now how damaging that mindset was. It kept me in a cycle of seeking external validation instead of finding it within myself. I wish I had realized sooner that love isn’t about constant attention. True love, real care, doesn’t have to be flashy or always visible. And more importantly, the validation I was chasing from others was something I should’ve been giving myself all along.
If I could go back, I would teach my younger self that you don’t need anyone’s approval to feel worthy. I’d tell myself to take off the mask, to stop pretending, and to trust that I am enough as I am—without needing to perform for others. I wish I had learned earlier that it’s okay to be vulnerable, and that real connection comes from showing up authentically, not from trying to be perfect or constantly seeking attention.
The sooner we learn to love and accept ourselves, the sooner we can experience genuine peace and fulfillment. I wish I hadn’t waited so long to embrace this truth, but I’m grateful that I’ve finally learned it now.
But hey, better late than never, right? So, here’s to unmasking, embracing the awkwardness, and learning to just be me.
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
Lately, the changes I’ve been implementing in my life have revolved around the importance of pausing to acknowledge and be grateful for the simple yet significant blessings we often take for granted, like the air we breathe and the opportunities we’re afforded. A quote that has stuck with me is “Let go and let God be.” Despite my ambitions and aspirations, I’ve come to realize that genuine wisdom stems from recognizing that I can’t always control every aspect of life, no matter how much I may wish to do so.
Upon pondering this question, I embarked on a little quest to seek out perspectives from my friends, family, and acquaintances by asking them to describe me in a single word. The responses were diverse and thought-provoking, with each individual offering a unique viewpoint on my character. From descriptors like ambitious, amiable, and charismatic to words such as outgoing, bodacious, passionate, curious, caring, and even high maintenance, the range of perceptions led me to engage in deep self-reflection. While none of my friends mentioned the word “Trailblazer,” it is a term that resonates deeply with me. “Trailblazer” embodies qualities of a pioneer and innovator, characteristics that my grade 10 business teacher recognized in me. His insight has stuck with me, highlighting aspects of myself that I may not have fully acknowledged at the time, particularly my outgoing nature and unwavering drive to pursue my aspirations relentlessly. That’s why If asked to describe myself with a single word, I would confidently choose “Trailblazer,” as it encompasses all the traits expressed by others and resonates with the essence of who I am.
What is your middle name? Does it carry any special meaning/significance?
My middle name is Avesha. I pronounce my name as A-Ve-Sha, but some people pronounce it as Ae-V-Ah-Sha.In my research, I have discovered that “Avesha” is a Sanskrit word that signifies being “imbued with” or “possessed by.” In Hindu philosophy, Avesha represents a state of total absorption or immersion in a specific mental or spiritual state. It also denotes being under the influence of a deity or divine energy. From my understanding , “Avesha” symbolizes being deeply influenced by a specific belief, emotion, or thought.
Oh, goodness! I always dread being asked why my bum is so big and why I’m so thick. It’s simply genetics, you know. I inherited it from my momma, and she got it from her momma.
How has a failure, or apparent failure, set you up for later success?
Personally, embracing failure as a learning experience has been crucial in paving the way for my future success. I believe that failure does not define me, but rather shapes me into a stronger individual. Looking back on what I once considered failures, I have come to appreciate the valuable lessons learned and the growth that has resulted from those experiences. Enduring hardships has helped me build resilience and gratitude, transforming me into a more appreciative and adaptable person. Without facing struggles, I may not have developed the same level of resilience and appreciation for the ongoing journey towards success. I have come to understand that success is not solely measured by money or accolades, but also by the discipline and principles that guide my path.
In the pursuit of life’s purpose, one often grapples with profound questions, seeking meaning in the midst of uncertainty and ambiguity. As the Ivan Goncharov once said, ‘If you don’t know what you are living for, then you haven’t lived yet.’ This sentiment has been the guiding light of my journey, propelling me forward through the twists and turns of existence.
Daily writing prompt
You’re writing your autobiography. What’s your opening sentence?
Dose of chevvi 